Friends are an important part of life that makes your journey more fun and enjoyable. Friendship is a natural phenomenon that isn’t even limited to people!
Despite a natural inclination to being social, some people can have a more difficult time connecting with their peers than others. Just walk into a classroom and you’ll recognize this within moments.
There are some outgoing individuals who are naturally full of pep and social competence and others that struggle a bit with it. While these differences and social skills are completely natural, the inability to make friends can be isolating.
Lacking social skills doesn’t mean you don’t want to have them. Luckily, even if you aren’t born with superior social skills, you can learn how to make friends!
The first thing you want to do is make yourself seem more open to making friends.
How do I make myself more approachable?
If you notice that people aren’t inviting you to plans or trying to get to know you – it probably has something to do with the “vibes” you are giving off. When you look like you are not interested in making friends, people will be less likely to approach you.
There are some things you can do to make you look like an easy person to have a conversation with:
- Smile! – Research has found that facial expressions impact how approachable others perceive you to be. To make people more likely to approach you – try to convey positive emotions.
- Make eye contact – Making eye contact is a great way to establish a connection with somebody. Just make sure you don’t stare too intensely or long as that can make people uncomfortable. Moderation is key!
- Practice personal hygiene – People are more likely to approach someone clean and put together. If your clothes are torn up and you appear to be dirty, outsiders might perceive you as a threat and actively avoid you.
Put yourself out
Remember though, taking all these things into consideration does not guarantee that potential friends will be flocking to you. Sometimes you will need to be the person who makes the first move.
Still keep the above recommendations in mind and try to be as friendly as possible so the people you approach will want to connect with you. Try to understand that sometimes people will want to say no, and that’s ok.
How to make a friendship last
Once you have a friend, you should take some simple steps to make sure that your friendships grow. There is always room for you to both cultivate new companionships and strengthen the relationships you always have.
Remember – “make new friends but keep the old ones. One is silver and the other’s gold.”
While there are sometimes unavoidable, organic reasons why friendships dissolve, you can take steps to keep your friendships going.
Basically, what you have to do is be a good friend!
How to be a good friend
Being a good friend means that you are active in a friendship when you can be – even when it’s not fun. It means that you put effort into keeping your friendships alive! You need to prove that your friendships are a matter of fun and not just a mere matter of convenience.
Some traits of a good friend are:
- Someone who keeps in contact: Even if you can’t always be there in person, emotional growth within a friendship is correlated with non-verbal communication as well. Send your friends messages every once in a while just to check in! Everyone appreciates seeing “this reminded me of you” in their inbox.
- Be a good person: Being a positive person offers enough reason for someone to want to stay friends with you! People love to keep friendships with people are expressive, open, and positive! Of course, there will be times where you can’t be happy, but people don’t like to hang around with someone who is always negative or brings them down.
- Stay through thick and thin – friendships are the family you choose. Sometimes, you need to help yourselves through tough times. This works both ways and there shouldn’t be one person giving more than the other. Remember to give back to your friendships and not bail the moment things get serious.
How do you guys keep your friendships going? Feel free to comment your success stories below!